People Only Bring Up Your Past When They're Intimidated by Your Present

With having such joy in my life lately, and thoughts of going back home to MA for a big visit, I've been thinking about family and other people that always felt they had the right to say shit about me. The nay-sayers, the doubters, the ones that bring zero joy to your life, the ones that define "haters are my motivators". Those people that will judge your every move without once looking at their own lives. Thinking that they know you and know every detail about you. They're usually pretty close to 100% wrong. If you've never spent quality time with me, I can guarantee you that you don't know me. You may know pieces here and there of things that have happened or that I've been through, but you don't know me.  Do I have a cookie cutter past? Hahaha no! But who does? Someones past is just that, a past. It's gone. It's sitting in the same place yours is, behind us. Growing up is a real thing. You make mistakes, you hurt people, you get hurt and as life goes on, you get over all that stuff and learn from it and it molds you into the person you're meant to be. Someday I will probably blog about some things I've been through, some decisions I've made. But it's unnecessary right now, I'm not here to blog about how dark my early 20s were, I'm here now at 31 years old to write about all the amazing things that my life is now. I'm not the same person I used to be, most people aren't when they reach this age. The very few people that matter in my daily life know me inside and out, past and present. They accept me for everything that I have ever been; the same way I accept them. No one is perfect.  Everyone has "secrets", everyone has done things they wish they could take back. But without those things, you may not be who you are today. Some people change for the better, some worse and some just get stuck. The ones that get stuck are the most pained, seeing everyone around them surpass them, living in happiness, while they are stuck in their hole that they created for themselves. Some people put that hate right out there on facebook, hating on their own family and friends, when it's such obvious jealousy. I know from experience, you will not get out of that hole unless you turn your eyes onto yourself. Fix yourself; your life, your relationship, your insecurities, and stop focusing on what other people are doing or have done. It's irrelevant to you and your everyday life. The energy people use on hating others, if they turned that energy onto themselves to work out their issues, they will start seeing way more beauty in and around them. I've learned this on my own, and in seeing others change. And I'm still growing from it. 


In other news, I was going through the pictures in my phone and realized I never posted about our day in Paradise Cove, Malibu. Basically the most relaxing place in LA. Apparently not a lot of people know about it, so it's far from over crowded like all the other beaches here. It was so pretty and there were hundreds and hundreds of pelicans! I took a video of them all dive bombing into the water for food, but it didn't save. Hashtag sad face. 
just hanging out with some pelicans




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6 comments :

  1. This hit home, especially after moving back around my family. Some people are committed to remembering how you were when you were 13, no matter what. Blek. Way to be strong, girl.

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  2. i want to go to paradise! no one can bring up your past there!

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  3. Loved your post! The only thing you can do with mistakes from your past is learn from them and move on and if people can't deal with that they werent worth it to begin with. :)

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  4. beautifully written! I personally am happy to be past my own early 20's, but am glad of what I learned from the growing process.

    PS. Those birds are huge, and I would probably be scared they'd chase me! :) Gorgeous beach!

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  5. Oh girl. Some of the things in my past, whew I'm not proud of! But f the haters. You wouldn't be who you are today without some of those mistakes!

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  6. screw the haters. we are who we are because of the dumb mistakes we make!

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