Pets Are People Too #2

wait, what even is this thing? am i doing it right? 

hello world.  it's me.
i need your help to end the existence of this device that taunts me in my kingdom. my parents call it the xbox. why i call them my parents, i don't even know. they look nothing like my handsome self. in fact, they're weird looking and have no fur and if i'm being honest here, that really creeps me out. but they cover themselves in these things i like to pull out of the drawers. i think they're called clothes. so i guess that's like fur. whatever.

anyways back to this torturous xbox thing. i hate it. i try to kill it every single day. all.day.and.night. for the past year. my dad even stacked dvds in front of it but i keep pushing them out of the way to get to this bastard contraption. then he got out the water bottle and sprayed me! asshole! but i showed him, i went right back. again and again. i must defeat this xbox. i don't understand it, but i know it's evil. i use my nose to bring it to life, and then it throws itself at me! who does that!? and sometimes it does it on it's own!! it's so scary! i totally freeze up when it opens.

this thing is rude and distracting and i want it gone.



this is me all stressed out. and my parents are laughing at me because they are assholes. i really freeze up big time around the 1 minute mark. i got so focused on it's death. i freeze for about an entire minute!




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i left this post to go do cat stuff. a week later, i'm back. and i have great news. i killed it! i heard the parents say something about "unplugged". that must be another word for the cat has ruled his kingdom and has defeated the xbox. so it turns out that i don't need your help at all. but thanks for stopping by. i'm gonna go lick my butthole now. bye!

ps- my mom might do a vlog next week! but she can only do it with your help. go check out THIS POST and see what i'm talking about. also, if you help enough and she does it, i'll probably make a cameo because i'm nosy.

i hope my writing was ok. i don't have thumbs and i don't talk human very well. 

xoxo, DeNiro

Jade and Oak


14 comments :

  1. I just watched the video of DeNiro vs. the XBox and I'm dying laughing. Seriously. He's such a character!

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  2. I wonder what it was about the xbox he hated so much, maybe it made a noise only he could hear?

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  3. haha this is too cute!!

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  4. he's like no other cat i've ever known haha. he's one of a kind

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  5. i wish he could tell me. maybe he thinks it was really alive because of the open and close. he still goes over to it now even though it's unplugged, tries to figure out why it won't do anything haha

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  6. haha this is so cute!! so funny about the x box!

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  7. Hahaha!! I'm so glad you killed it Deniro!!

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  8. Haha!! That light is too much for a cat!!

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  9. i don't have thumbs. - classic!

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  10. haha oh my gosh. so much stress for poor deniro! And thanks so much for linking up :)
    -- jackie @ jade and oak

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  11. BAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH! I laughed wayyyy too hard at this video! "then he got out the water bottle and sprayed me! asshole!" poor guy!

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  12. DeNiro said thank you for the support in his victory!

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